Lately recent conversations and actions have really got me thinking about friendships and what they are and truly mean. When you have that set few friends that you know you can trust whole heartedly, you’ve really got to keep them close to your chest.
As you get older, you realise who your true friends are. You may only be able to count them on one hand, but hey they’re the ones that are always going to be there for you, no matter what. If you’re in trouble, sick or just need a chat they are the ones that will drop everything just to make sure you’re okay.
On the other side of things, you may feel like you’re always the one making the effort? Well, let me tell you…you are not alone, I have talked to a few people about this lately and it seems like there are a lot more people that feel that way than you think. Making plans is your thing right, but it doesn’t mean you want to plan everything. It’s almost too much pressure sometimes. Why should you be the one to organise everything. It makes you wonder, do they really want to hang out with you or are they doing it because you asked. I know 99% of the time, the answer will be – they do want to hang out, they’re just bad at communicating and organising. It’s just nice to know that you’re wanted sometimes, and that someone else is thinking about doing something with you and not just the other way round.
However, if you really do think you need to meet new people – which I am totally for. I mean, who is to say you’re supposed to have that one group of friends. It’s nice to break the mould once and a while, get a new perspective on things.
Making new friends is hard, it’s probably even harder as you get older. Where do you meet people nowadays? Even if you join a club, you might not click with whoever else is there, or they might not be very friendly towards you. The likelihood is that they already have their own groups, and are too stuck in their ways to involve anyone else into their conversation. I must admit, this has happened to me as of late. I joined a running club thinking that there might be a few people there that I’d make friends with and possibly do things socially other than running, this has not happened. Who knew going to a new club, people would be so unwelcoming half the time. I mean, I don’t know if it’s just me, or if it’s the people at the club, either way, they all seem to be stuck in their own ways. I’m not sure if it has something to do with the age. I’m sure the majority are 10 years + older than me. I think I will keep going, and we will slowly see if things change. I mean, if I don’t make the effort, who will eh?
Social media has a big part to play in all of this. It gives everyone an illusion that you’re having a good time, with lots of friends all of the time. I mean, don’t get me wrong you might be doing that, but at the same time…you could be fabricating your own life to make it seem better than it really is.
I enjoy Instagram just as much as the next person, but half the time when I am scrolling through, seeing all these wonderful activities people are doing it’s just getting me down. Yes, they are inspiring and it’s great that whoever they are, they are having fun, going on adventures and things, but it does make me feel a bit left out. I know that a lot of the activities I’m not doing because I don’t have access to them, but it still is a bit of a bummer. I need to look into things that I will enjoy locally, and stop looking online and just get out there. The one problem I have though – a lot of my best friends, do not live as locally as a quick phone-call to ask them to hang out. If I want to do things, I have to plan – which some of the time, sucks. If I don’t have any plans for a weekend, I pretty much know how it is going to go. I need some spontaneity in my life. So, I am going to make the most of my spare time. Create something, plan something, do something meaningful that will make me think – you’re having a good time, even if you’re doing it alone. It’ll be satisfying and fulfilling.